Insane RP Adventure!!

(Beat was/is.)

[Have a massive nose bleed]
[Negotiate]

Beat was holding his hand under his nose as blood bled all over his chest and and face.

Beat: I WANT MY PANTS

"Well, now this fight can't possibly be any worse than that lizard girl down there. Fricken' hate those speed demons. Anyway, let's get start!"

As he finished speaking, Xafiel quickly pulled his two pistols up to aim at the druid and pulled the triggers. At this exact moment, his mind went into Super Extreme Bullet Time mode. He stood an watched as the two bullets worked their ways out of the chambers, the sparks flying off into empty space as the gunpowder burned and the bullets scraped the inside of the guns and entered into free flight towards his current target. In his mind, though, all of this seemed to take place over the course of perhaps a week and a half. He then starts thinking that maybe he was over doing this effect far too much, as speeding up one's mind to makes a half a millisecond seem to last for over a week really wrecks their ability to think straight for a certain long amount of time. Even more so when he began considering the poisoned daggers that had hit him from before.

After what seemed to be another twenty-four hours, he managed to pull himself out of this state, to instantly crash to the floor due to the mental willpower it took to perform such a feat and had lost track of the flying of the bullets.

[use wind powers] While lamenting the fact that my bread is in another castle, I use some PEP to blow the hipsters out of the sky (maybe, I don't run this thing) and blow away the fireballs (see previous parenthetical).

{For Beat}

The snake girl holding Beat's pants waves it and tosses it on the bed across the room.

"You want it? Go get them."

[Do something]
[Do nothing]






{For Atriarch}

Atriarch skateboards to a small town which is completely empty and ominously dark. In the distance, Atriarch hears gunfire and talking.

"PEELZ!"

"I hate small towns..."

[Look around]
[Shoot a flare]
[Pull out your camera since the chopper arrives in 72 hours]
[Do Thriller]
[Join the undead (They have great benefits these days!)]
[Call in the tactical nuke]
[Do something]
[Do nothing]






{For Xafiel}

Xafiel falls to the floor and the villain sitting on a sofa looks up at him, turning away from his PSP game. He then raised his hands and the suits of armor in the room come alive.

"Such a foolish mortal. That took so long I already beat the 8 Robot Masters!"

He doesn't seem to be interested in you anymore, so uh...leave or fight?





{For Altu}

The wind created a hurricane of sharp slices that destroy the hipster chicks and remove the fireballs.

"So you got that job as a janitor after all."

(What?) The fiend breaks free from the gold and enters a...Backstreet Boys dance routine?

"I'ma kick your mortal ass,
From here to over there!
Oh yeah, with my sass
I'll kick your derierre!"

...Wow, this guy is whiter than Vanilla Ice and makes Justin Beiber look like Michael Jackson...

Xafiel slowly stood up to his feet, dizzy, and looked to his "enemy" over on the couch. It seemed to him that the "bullet time" really did take as long as it felt since he seems to have somehow reversed the effects. He then realized that he hadn't eaten for a week and a half.

"Ugh... Think we could order a pizza and have a restart later?"

His attention, shortly after asking his question, went to the PSP. "Oh! Which Megaman game is that?"

[Shoot a flare]

[ruin the dance] "Hey, King Dedede! I hate to interrupt the big gay dance, but I've got to be going." I take some of the gold and jewels from the ruined throne and attempt to be on my way out.

[Do something Cry like the goddarn baby you are]

{For Beat}

A snake girl walks up to beat and smiles mischievously in his face.

"Oh cheer up, cutey. Smile!"

The snake girl with insane agility darts behind Beat and wraps her legs around his waist, hugging him from behind. As she holds Beat's arms down with her hug, she brings her fingers onto his sides and begins tickling him. The others seem to see where she's going with this and start closing in on Beat.

[Do something]
[Do nothing]




{For Atriarch}

Atriarch fires a flare and moments after the explosion several other flares start shooting. It starts forming a Fourth of July fireworks show and...what the? It just spelled out "Screw you, stop wasting flares" high in the air. The people still unseen scream.

"We're not infected!"
"BUMPER CARS!"
"KIDDY LAND!"
"Who the hell are you?"
"MAH FRIENDS CALL ME COACH!"

[Do something]
[Do nothing]



{For Xafiel}

The big bad mamma-jamma throws a whole pizza box at Xafiel.

"I already ordered like nine..."



{For Altu}

The Demon Lord curses loudly at Altu as he casually strides off.

"COME BACK HERE! My routine isn't done yet! I knew I shouldn't have tried to mimic DragonBall Z!!!"

As Altu leaves, he sees a lone treasure chest sitting on the ground. Is it that Mimic again, or is this one actually full of riches and booty and...whatever slang for treasure?

[get out] "I know I promised to come back for you, mimic, but you lied to me. There wasn't any bread there, only transvestites. Do not want." I simply walk out of the castle and look for the other one.

{For Altu}

Altu receives a telepathic message from what sounds like the Mimic.

"He does have bread! I just didn't know if that was the kind you wanted! I'm sorry! *Sob*"

Well, whatever the case, looks like there's some kind of parade going on. Everything is so black (color wise, you racist D:) and there's some man asking a kid if he'll be the savior of the broken, beaten, and damned.

...boooooooring.

[Trigger insanity]
[Go for a pleasure walk]

[Do something]
Atriarch backs away slowly, then runs away fast.

[Do something Scream no as if you were Darth Vader]

Beat: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

[blast string quartet version] Since Altu's iPod got pwned by that rhino earlier, he uses his DSi to blast the string quartet version of The Black Parade. It was awesome. Also, he wonders why there are now given commands, breaking the fourth wall.

As for important story related actions, I'll head off to the square to check the time on the clock tower if there is one.

Xafiel was eating the pizza a slice at a time while holding up a conversation.

"So I had a bit of trouble getting out of that situation. The malfunctioning soldiers robots eventually formed a union to protest their leader's tendency to blow them up out of boredom and they had a meeting which left me unguarded. Used a wrench left out on the workbench next to me to crack my shackles on my legs and made a run for it." He took another bite, "But yea, strayed off my thought path. Robots seem like good guards, but the moment they become sentient, they tend to screw you over. Know what I mean?"

{For Beat}

Death "I'll save you the time."

{At Death's Door}

Death "Look on the bright side: you died a very sexy death surrounded by hot scalies. You don't know what most people on the internet would do to get in that kind of spot."

[Revive]
[Stay dead]
[Go get lunch with Death]





{For Atriarch}

Atriarch runs quickly from the insane voices that he is hearing and stumbles upon a sword lodged into a rock. The funny thing is that the blade is sticking out and the handle is the part stuck inside the rock. FAIL

[Pry it out holding the blade]
[Break the rock]
[Call someone for help]
[Punch the flat part of the blade]
[Use the rather floppy blade as a catapult to leave this dump]
[Go to sleep]
[Do nothing]





{For Altu}

Altu looks at the time. The clock is a large banana stacked with a peanut butter jelly sandwich holding a baseball bat, and the hour hand is on a hammer.

Looks like there's a rave going on. Some guy with a large yellow and blue mohawk and blue shades wearing a yellow shirt, sleeveless blue hoodie, loose black pants, and blue shoes with yellow laces is breakdancing in the middle of it all, a small little yellow pet duckling with a blue strand of hair sticking out near the guy.






{For Xafiel}

Demon Lord "Yes, I know. Dr. Sloth even admitted they're just for show. Really awkward since the guy can't seem to do jack by himself. I mean, did you see how "The Return of Doctor Sloth" ended? They had an epic fight to get to him and POW! He gets absorbed into a gem and vanishes. It was such a ripoff.

Beat: Yeah... that was good, thanks man. Hey, you wanna grab some lunch?

[Go get lunch with Death]

[Break the rock]

[fanboyness manouver] "ZOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG DUCK KING!!!!!! Hey, do you think you could beat up Eddie from Tekken? Just cuz he's a dancing fighting guy like you, and that would be a cool fight. Also, what hair dye do you use?" rant rant rant fanboy for a while. Also, the only reason I asked about time is Altu is probably a tiny bit tired by now...

{For Beat}

Death and Beat soon find themselves eating in an American diner with Beat having a milkshake and large burger with fries.

Death "...and the funny thing is you're the second person to die. Atriarch died like 3 times already, so you're fine. Want a revive?"

[Yes]
[No]
[Let's get drunk!]





{For Atriarch}

Atriarch busts the rock with his fist...or at least he tries. He punches the rock, and after a few seconds the sword cracks and falls apart into several small pieces. What a gyp!

[Harvest the sword bits]
[Take the rock with you]
[Call the Bulls*** police]
[DO A BARREL ROLL!]
[Take off to fight the Lord of the Swamplands.]
[Do nothing]




{For Altu}

Duck King stops breakdancing and spins around, pointing at Altu.

"Yes! I am the Duck King!"

Duck moonwalks to Altu and presses his sunglasses against his face.

"Take on Eddy, huh? Hah, I've always wanted to, he's such a ripoff of me AND Bob Wilson! Let's go!"

Duck King's pet chick P-Chan jumps onto his hand and gives Altu a thumbs up.

[Duck King joined your party!]

{Achievement Unlocked: Team Player (G10) Get a teammate}
{Achievement Unlocked: Fatally Furious (G100) "YES! SOMEONE ELSE WHO KNOWS ABOUT FATAL FURY! HUZZAH!"}

[Harvest the sword bits]

{For Atriarch}

As Atriarch collects the sword bits, water begins to shoot from the hole in the rock where the sword was lodged. Soon the water raises into a fountain and a beautiful blue water spirit (she's nude!...oh wait, these are water boobies. LAME) who looks like she belongs in an anime looks at him.

"Please, herr knight, you must save me from the verevolfs."

A German water spirit in the US? Well, that's interesting. One thing you may want to take note of is the fact that, accent or not, there are w-OH MY GOD BEHIND YOU THERE'S THE WEREWOLVES!

The werewolves look sorta like Jon Talbain from Darkstalkers, only slightly darker; no lie! Quick, where are those sparkling vampires? These guy's will show 'em what REAL terrors of the night are!

[Fight]
[Talk]
[Negotiate]
[Attack the water spirit]
[Try to put the bits back into the rock]
[Throw a barrel at them]
[Run away]
[FURRIES! OH NOES!]
[Do nothing]

[Let's get drunk!]

[introductions] I'll try to swallow the fanboyness and tell him my story and my issues getting demonic baked goods.

{For Beat}

Beat and Death sit at a bar, Death himself seeming to be pretty damn drunk despite not having a digestive tract.

"And lemme tell ya, why do I gotta kill the good people, huh? Bad guys kill tons of people and I gotta kill them after their evil and I gotta kill Elvis right when I'm about to attend his concert!"

[Revive]
[Do something]
[Do nothing]










{For Altu}

Duck King "Cool story, bro! I'll help out a bit, gotta settle it with Eddy!"

A radio report nearby turns on.

"This just in: Eddy Gordo has been reported missing in Downtown Nekketsu."

Where's that?