Insane RP Adventure!!

Beat: I'm OK with this. No TWEWY stuff though, thanks. I would like the head to toe copy of the Captains uniform, mug included, from the comic series Romantically Acopalyptic. All I can afford is authentic, is there any way we could negotiate so that you'd make me the real thing for a little less money? On second thought, I don't really need his gasmask, if that helps.

http://fc05.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2010/192/3/6/Zee_Captain_by_alexiuss.jpg

[Call Rey_JJJ for help NOW]

{For Beat}

Owner "Ah, that series. Heh, keen choice. Just a moment."

The man behind the counter walks down the aisles and soon returns with the Captain's outfit.

"Gas mask comes with it for free. If you want to run a job for me, I'll give you the suit now so you can run it. Once I hear wind you completed it, its yours."

[Okay]
[Pay up]
[Run off]
[Start a robbery]
[Leave]
[Do nothing]







{For Atiarch}

Rey_JJJ sadly isn't online! Maybe there's something I can do since he's showed me something familiar...

FOUND!



Bad news, dood! You'd better bust her ass down! She seems like a higher level one than in the picture!

[Panic]
[Attack]
[Panic Attack (I don't like that song)]
[Flail arms like a Gmod ragdoll]
[Run really fast with her still clinging onto you]
[Faint from bloodloss due to excessive nosebleed]
[Kill self]
[Do nothing]

{For Xafiel}

Xafiel rocket shoots into the castle tower...and slams painfully into it. He slides down to the ground and feels dizzy from the excessive poison he's taken in the last 20 seconds. Standing up, this looks like the tower. There's a conveniently open window for him to enter.

[Kill self]
"cant have my soul if it isn't there!"
Atriarch stops breathing and gos limp. his heart stops beating and his blood stands still.

"Ugh... oh... right..." Xafiel pulls the knife out of hes thigh and throws it down into the castle's courtyard. He then stumbles through the tower window and collapses to the floor. After moment of resting, he looks at his new surroundings.

Beat: Hell yeah!

[Okay]

{For Beat}

Store Owner "Alright, here's your gear. Now, I need you to fetch me bread from the Demon Lord's Castle. Its not an easy palce to get into and it's sure as hell dangerous and not worth it, but hey, at least you'll die looking snazzy.

[Do stuff]
[Leave]
[Do nothing]




{For Atriarch}

Atriarch suffocates and the Mimic frowns.

Mimic "Aw..."

The Mimic tosses Atriarch across the room into a pit and goes back in her chest.

{At Death's Door}

Death "Achievement Unlocked; you're the only person to die in this RP, and you've died TWICE. I bet you feel reeeeeeeeal special."

[Revive]
[Talk]
[Do nothing]





{For Xafiel}

Xafiel sees a randomly snazzy bedroom with red velvet decorations everywhere. In the middle of the room there is a beautiful princess locked over pure white crystals and a druid covered with mecnacing tattoos next to her.

Druid "So you've come to save Caleigh. Another Chosen One, I figure? You'd best know that she's not really a princess. She's the demon of destruction: The reason the world is being filled with the undead. I sealed her away years ago, but it looks like you're the one Chosen One she picked that has actually made it here. So decide: Do you want to join me, or the princess?"

Princess "How shameful! He is making lies to prevent you from saving me after all your hardships!"

{Extra option: Screw you guys, I'm getting a beer}

[Do stuff]

Beat puts his new gear on, and then stands around for a while in akward silence, staring deep into the soul of the store owner trough the purple lenses of the gasmask. He then suddenly turned his head left, said "Mein cake!" and ran off.

[Talk]
"I wonder if i can die in here to."
Atriarch starts eating a burrito he found under the couch... eew.

[try a lame pick-up line] while attempting to not be turned on by the hot chick and wonder why she had to hide to get me, I say, "I was blinded by your beauty so I'm going to need your name and number for insurance reasons."

{For Beat}

Beat runs out of the shop head first into a small pair of breasts. MM looks at him and punches him in his gas mask covered face.

MM "BEEEEAT! BAKA!!!!"

She punches him super hard, causing Beat to have a Ruroni Kenshin "ORO?!?!" reaction and sending him far into the air. As he starts to land, Beat soon slams into a large soda display on top of a fast food restaurant. As he falls onto solid ground, he sees he's standing on a burger joint...in the middle of the desert.

[Explore]
[Get a burger]
[Go to sleep]
[Whine about the heat]
[Do nothing]



{For Atriarch}

Death "No you can't. Do you want revives or not?"

[Yes]
[Yes, before I goofed]
[Wanna go get a milkshake?]




{For Altu}

Mimic "Aw...I don't have a phone number or a name. Just stay here with me!"

Strange vines are coming out of the chest are look like they're trying to wrap around Altu.

[Yes]
"see you in three minuets."

{For Atriarch}

Atriarch revives in the middle of a throne room. On the throne there is a skeleton wearing golden armor and blood red flags hang from the walls.

Skeleton "AN intruder? I say, this is a rather bloody nuisance before tea time. Cheerio, ol' chap!"

The skeleton draws his sword and gets ready to fight.

[Talk]
[negotiate]
[Surrender]
[Run]
[Grab the ring and go to the secret bonus level]
[Use your flamethrower]
[Act gay and come onto him]
[Do nothing]

[negotiate]
"Why do we have to fight? can't you drop aggro, then we can talk this over."

(o lol, dat was funny. anyhow, does Ruroni Kenshin count as a pop culture reference?)

[Explore]

Beat lifted his new gasmask, and had blood coming out - turns out the gasmask is also designed to hide anime like nosebleeds. Once all the blood was gone, he put his mask put on and looked around.

Beat: This has got to be the worst burger joint I have ever seen!

{For Beat}

(I kinda gave you that one announcing where its from)

As Beat complains about the burger joint, a man comes out and puts up a brand new sign.

"This has GOT to be the WORST burger joint I have ever seen!" - Random skyrocketed person

Beat jumps off the roof of the place and looks around. Inside looks like your average retro American diner (it even has a jukebox!) and there seems to be some kind of oasis in the distance with a generic palm tree and water

[Go inside]
[Go to the oasis]
[Complain about the heat]
[Fall asleep on the ground]
[Blow up the place and use the explosion to propel yourself forward]
[Do nothing]





{For Atriarch}

Skeleton "Uh...gee...I dunno."

[2 minutes later]

Skeleton "(somehow sipping tea) and that's why we always have to challenge people that come in. Those girl scouts are dangerous."

The skeleton sighs and stands up, kicking the table over.

"Now then, shall we?"

[Talk]
[negotiate]
[Surrender]
[Run]
["Wanna go get a beer?")
[Grab the ring and go to the secret bonus level]
[Use your flamethrower]
[Act gay and come onto him]
[Do nothing]

[Talk]
"yeah sure, why not?"
Atriarch draws his Japanese short swords. one with a white sheath and a red blade, one with a dark gray sheath and a white blade.

{For Atriarch}

Skeleton "Alright, have at ye!"

The skeleton pulls out a pirate Cutlass and pulls out a generic pirate stereotype voice change.

Skeleton "I challenge ye to a battle of insult sword fighting!"

(How to play:)

Your opponent throws an insult at you. Make a comeback to kick his insult's ass to gain a lead, then you make an insult. If you make a good one, good job, you're winning. If it sucks or doesn't make sense, way to go, you're getting your ass handed to you.

Skeleton "I once owned a dog that was smarter than you!"

[I'm glad to hear you attended your family reunion]
[How appropriate. YOU fight like a cow]
[First you better stop waving it around like a feather duster]
[You run THAT fast?]
[You would have, but you're always running away]
[They must have taught you everything you know]
[I am rubber, you are glue.]
[I'm shaking, I'm shaking!]
[Oh yeah?!]
[I surrender!]
[Call someone to help you]
[Run away]
[Pull out a gun]
[Do nothing]

[They must have taught you everything you know]

"Ah... Mister... Druid... Eh.... I'ma call you Drew," Xafiel inhales deeply as he works his way to his feet, "You put out quite the long speech there. Kinda feels like you threw them together rather fast though, Drew," He takes several steps counter clockwise of the room as he speaks, playfully flipping the pistol in his right hand, "You gave all those big words saying she was not a princess, yet with the options you gave me, support you or support the princess, you clearly call her a princess rather than that demonic nercopolinsersomethinganother... Whatever it was that you had said that you were talking about. Must be your first day in villainy."

Xafiel stops next to a small table at the end of the room and points his left pistol at the Druid while leaning against the table with his right arm, "I'm going to support the princess there. By the way, your magic marker is wearing off."

(Ahahahaha oh god I laughed so hard)

[Go inside]

{For Beat}

Beat steps inside the burger joint. Waitresses on rollerskates were serving people who were either on laptops, playing card games, or sitting around doing nothing. Great, this better not be another "theme" place...

Menu:

Burger (100)
Cheeseburger (125)
Double burger (200)
Fries (100)
Soda (100)
Milkshake (200)
Combo Meal (Double, fries, soda for 500)

[Order something off the menu]
[Start a robbery]
[Kick some ass]
[Steal stuff and run]
[Talk to a random person]
[Kill it with fire]
[Leave]
[Do nothing]







{For Atriarch}

The skeleton's sword shakes as he steps backwards from getting served.

[I've fought mudcrabs fiercer than you!]
[I got this scar during a mighty struggle!]
[My blade is famous throughout the world!]
[I'm well known throughout every dirty corner of this crummy world!]
[You fight like a dairy farmer]
[Your more repulsive than a monkey in a negligee]
[Have you stopped wearing diapers yet?]
[I surrender!]
[Pull out a gun]
[Run away]
[Do nothing]



{For Xafiel}

Druid "It matters not how I address Caleigh since she is disguised as a princess hence why I call her that, but it seems that you only care to nitpick. So be it!

The druid pulls out a long staff with a funky orb on top and fires green energy bolts everywhere.

[I've fought mudcrabs fiercer than you!]

{For Atriarch}

Skeleton "Oh yeah?!"

The skeleton steps back from getting hit upside the head by both Atriarch's sharp sword and equally sharp wit.

Skeleton "You're no match for my skills, you pathetic fool!"


[I'm glad to hear you attended your family reunion]
[How appropriate. YOU fight like a cow]
[First you better stop waving it around like a feather duster]
[You run THAT fast?]
[You would have, but you're always running away]
[They must have taught you everything you know]
[I'd be in real trouble if you actually used them]
[I am rubber, you are glue.]
[I'm shaking, I'm shaking!]
[Oh yeah?!]
[I surrender!]
[Call someone to help you]
[Run away]
[Pull out a gun]
[Do nothing]

[Talk to a random person]
[Kick some ass]
[Steal stuff and run]
[Kill it with fire]
[Leave]

Beat walked to a random person on his laptop, and asked

Beat: THE FUCK IS THIS AYE?! YOU BEING LIKE COOL OR SOMETHING WITH YO SHITTY COMPUTERS AND ALL AYE?!

then pushing the table the person was sitting on so everything on it fell on the laps of the people on it. Before the computer of the person managed to fall on him, Beat grabbed it and then kicked some ninja-ass for no real reason at all. He also took some hamburgers, chocolate bars, muffins, applepie and coke, and then left, magically lighting the whole place up as he did. Walking away from the fire, he was drinking coke with a straw trough one of the breathing holes of his new gasmask with all of the food piled on top of his head as he surfed the webpage "Reddit" for the lulz.